If there's one thing that makes me really uneasy -that really gets under my skin... it's swearing.
I swear. I swore on this here blog once.
But I do not swear in front of my kids, and I hardly ever swear out loud. I'm not saying this to sound self-righteous or to somehow stick my nose up to people who do swear.
I'm only saying that swearing makes me uncomfy, so I don't do it. I don't like being around it. It makes me squirm the same way bugs make other people squirm and the same way nails on the chalkboard make other people squirm.
When my husband and I were dating, he never swore. Not-a-once.
And then we were married. The hunt was over.
And the swears began coming out of my new husband's mouth. I didn't want to nag because I wanted to be a perfect little wife, but I did let him know that it bothered me.
Years later, the swearing had increased. Instead of asking him and nagging him to stop, I simply wrote him a letter and left it out for him to read.
"Please understand that I fight to keep the spirit in our home. I work hard at it, and you have the ability to destroy the work I've done with four letter words."
This may all seem eye-rolling dramatic to some of you, but I should also say that nothing much bothers me or gets under my skin. I don't care about toilet seats or clothes on the floor or hair in the sink.
After writing that letter, I even gave up on the whole "swearing" thing. I just dropped it. It wasn't worth it.
Well, now I have two extremely sweet children.
And lately, it's been a constant battle to keep their mouths clean -my husband's swearing has gotten much, much worse and half the time he doesn't even realize he's doing it.
In the meantime, I've got a four year old boy who stubs his toe and says, "Sunnuvva bitch!"
And I've got a five year old daughter who caught her parents making out in the kitchen and sweetly asked, "Why in the hell are you guys kissing?"
She's also taken the opportunity to tell guests that, "We don't say cock or bitch at our house because they're naughty words."
Every time one of my sweet little kiddos swears, I let my husband know. Every time my husband swears, I let him know.
How can I say, "We don't say those words," to my kids when ten minutes later, my husband is playing a video game and swearing up a storm?
I have no clue.
He's getting tired of me getting upset over something he doesn't feel is a big deal.
I'm getting tired of hearing my little ones sound like Spawns of Sailors.
His addiction has taught me that I have no control over him -over his actions. I have control over mine.
And I get that -I can do that.
I can live with a porn addicted man, but I can't stomach SWEARING. Isn't that nuts?
I can fight to keep porn out of my home. I can set up blocks, filters, throw out movies, delete music... but I can't keep swearing out.
I should clarify that I don't care if my husband swears... I just care if he brings it home and spouts off with the kids and I around.
I want it left at the door with the porn.
Also -being 35 weeks pregnant has grossly increased my level of intolerance.
Which is why I came here to type out my thoughts before I go to battle -once again -over the swearing.
I can't take another day of explaining to my kids that, yes, Daddy says it but NO you may not say it. That's not the kind of parenting I feel good about.